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The purpose of this page is to publish an interview with KOKIA for archival purposes that was originally published free of charge on a web page. However, we will promptly delete the page upon request from the copyright holder.
Source
- Original URL: http://www.fullcast.co.jp/cv/interview_02_03.html (dead link)
- Source URL: a backup in WebArchive (in Japanese)
The Second Voice: “Doing something only I can do.”
She studied abroad in the U.S. for a short time when she was in the fifth grade of elementary school. She could not speak English well and was stuck in her shell, but music saved her. Since then, she has come to believe that music is the universal language of the world.
KOKIA: It may sound funny, but I really think so. Nowadays, we can connect with everyone on the Internet. I get a lot of fan e-mail from people in countries other than Japan. I have people who know who I am through my music, who feel something when they hear me singing in Japanese. I have people, for example, who send me e-mail from as far as France. I think music is amazing.
— Does your experience in the U.S. lead you to your music life?
I’m not sure about that either. I went to a school, which is an an escalator school from junior high to high school. And I thought that if I continued in this school, I would not be able to do anything that I want to do. I didn’t know exactly what I wanted to do, but I knew I shouldn’t stay here. At that time, the quickest way to avoid the situation was to go to a classical music high school.
— You are able to go to high school in the escalator system, but you applied to another school.
I was told that I cannot come back to my school. But I have a mentality like “it’s going to happen somehow”. Fortunatelly, I could pass the music high school.
— What was your major in high school?
It’s opera. Vocal music.
— Did you only do opera?
All students in the department of opera do opera, but we all play the piano as well as a sub-major.
— You went to the same affiliated college as your high school, right?
Yes, it’s the same affilated college, though I had an entrance exam.
— And you made your debut while still in college. What is the reason for this?
There are many reasons, but to put it simply, I just thought “I want to do something only I can do”. Speaking of opera, we study and sing hard in Italian, French, and German. Everyone sings the same song. But, I also write songs, so the songs I sing are, weaved in my own words, with my own expressions, and it is something only I can do. Everyone values the reason why they have to be themselves, the reason for their existence. I really thought that singing songs that I wrote was more meaningful to me than singing operas.
— At that time, you thought so.
I don’t know, for example, what I’ll think when I turn to 40. Maybe, I will not think the same way as before, though.
— Have you been writing songs since you were young?
Well, speaking of playing the piano and singing, I have been doing it since I was in kindergarten. My mother used to tell me that when I could not read, I bring picture books and put them up on the piano and say “This is the music born from these pictures”, playing the piano. When I was in elementary school, I used to make up songs and sing them, every break.
— So, it comes out naturally for you, not to set out to create them.
Yes, it comes out naturally. It’s my form of expression. For example, there are people who express themselves through dance, but I entrusted it to singing, to music… I think I tried a lot of different things.
— Through the experience of making songs, did you think that you want put them out into the world at the time when you were in college?
It is like, people around me said, “Why don’t you make a demo tape?” Some people helped me. Some people were happy to help me. As I was making the tape, I thought that, well, I’ll try to make my debut. The thing I thougt at that time was that this is really something only I can do. That was one of deciding factors.
— Did you have a difficult sitiuation, like a setback, in continuing the music.
Not at all before starting my job. Because I like to sing my favorite song, right? But, from the day I debuted to today, I had a lot of difficult situations to death.
— Did you want to concentrate on making your artwork?
No, it’s not what I meant. It is not like just sining, but has various aspects. How can I say…, wel…, there were many things that bothered me.
— Do you worry that you have to sell your works?
It may not be good to put it too simply, it is already not at the level of concern whether I’m able to handle or not, but KOKIA itself is…, is not me, though it’s my name. There are my staff members, and we walk together. In my humble opinion, my job cannot be completed simply by singing the songs I want to sing. So, it is necessary to understand each other, communicate with each other, and sometimes, I need to have patience. I think that KOKIA is the result of all of these things.
— You gradually came to believe that after your debut, don’t you?
Of course. Because when I debuted, I was like a babe in the woods. I didn’t know how to record. I didn’t even know how the directors, producers, managers, record company people, and office staff would relate to me. So, rather than simply worrying about being a musician, it was my debut as a member of society.
— So you had a lot to learn as a member of society.
My job is relatively a special kind of work, but it’s about how to behave in the field and how to get along with people. Gradually, I began to understand a little more about these things, and I was finally able to talk about music. I am still learning as I get older.
Sometimes, I want to say “Gah!”.
— In short, you learned a lot other than making music.
As for songwriting, what is required will change as the times and staff change. Even if I can write my own songs, there are staff members who don’t like those kind of songs, and there are also requests to write something like this. I prefer to write like this, but there is an image of a tie-up, so I am asked to do it this way. It’s like I want to draw a red house, but I’m told arrogantly to make it a blue one.
— I see.
That is very humiliating for a creator. But whether I take it as a humiliation or, well…, if I’m satisfied with it, I can take it as a step toward a future. It depends on how I think. I have to have a varied thought process and work with conviction. I want to believe that I am learning this little by little, and I am growing.
— But, what about the purely artist part of yourself? Do you think you want to say, like, “Stop it!”.
Of course. Sometimes, I want to say “Gah!”. So in order to maintain my mental health, I write the songs I want to write. The other day, I deliberately sang them at a small live music club. It was a reward for myself.
— So you face problems that are not related to whether you can sell your songs or not.
Whether it sells or not has nothing to do with the artist’s feeling that the artist has something to sing or convey to the audience. For example, it would be great if I could release some of my treasures after ten years from now.
— Do you sometimes have trouble keeping a good balance?
Yes, there are times. It’s like a seesaw, so sometimes one part is heavier than the other part. But somehow, I manage. I do my best.
Even one of the most talented people, KOKIA, is trying her best to find balance within the world. Hearing such a story gives us a little courage, doesn’t it? And KOKIA’s tone gradually became more passionate. (“The Third Voice”, to be continued!)